Dealing with everyday life often leaves us feeling that we are on the brink, the brink of breaking, or maybe even a break down. Depending on how flexible you are, you might be able to bend. But like these rocks pictured above, can you bend enough so that you don’t break?
Arches National Park is one of the most breathtaking places I have ever visited. To see God’s creation, beauty, and these beautiful arches that are literally bending all around was quite extraordinary. Last summer, our family was blessed with the opportunity to travel across the country (you can read my posts Seckers Go West for an in depth depiction of that trip). Visiting Arches National Park was simply amazing. While sitting under these powerful, yet still arches of rock, bending over the top of us – I was reminded of how creative, powerful, and strategic God is. Only He could have created such delicate rocks that balance, bend, curve, and suspend in this beautiful desert.
(Pictured here – Double Arch and Balancing Rock)
I have often thought back to this past July and my time spent in Arches, but recently I started to reflect on what I started learning there in that national park and the journey that I have been on that is connected to those rocks. When faced with recent challenges I have felt like I was breaking. I have felt like I was going to just split in half, break apart. And in those moments I was breaking down. But like these rocks that God created to bend, I began to question, did he create me to bend too?
The most recent challenge that has left me on the verge of breaking has been trying to help my child who is struggling in school. (Even though we have been dealing with these struggles since early childhood.) This is not an issue that I often openly share because it is painful to share what you struggle with the most in life. There can also be a feeling of shame associated with thinking you are a failure as a parent. When our children are not successful, we as parents feel like we are the failures. Being a mom of a child with ADHD and a learning disability is definitely a cross that I would not have chosen to bear. There have been so many times when I have watched my child struggle while the exact same time I have watched other people’s children succeed. While I am happy for others – when I see my child feel like he is a failure – I literally break inside. And my husband and I often look at each other and say – Why can’t our kid just catch a break? (No pun intended – but the English teacher in me does love this line here.)
Even though, this part of parenting is one of the hardest challenges I have faced in life and continue to face, I am also working to bend. I often have to remind myself to focus on the positive and celebrate the best parts of my child. To not let others measure my success or his success and to not let either one of us feel like we are failing – whether it is at a sport, an academic area, or even just in the every day life of raising a preteen. As a mom, I am doing my best. As a kid, he is doing his best. And we cannot let others determine our worth, or yes – we will break.
Learning to bend so that I don’t break has been one of life’s lessons that continues to be challenging. Life can throw you for a loop when you least expect it and sometimes, even when you do expect it. When you are an OCD, control loving freak like me, it is easy to feel like you are about to break when faced with obstacles which are out of your control. Your breaking point will depend on your personal struggles, but I am living proof that you won’t break and that you can learn to bend. If I can become flexible, if I can change, and maybe if I can even go with the flow, so can you. Bending in this crazy world allows us flexibility so that we won’t feel like we are going to break and shatter into a million pieces.
Yoga is another area in my life, that actively teaches me to bend so that I don’t break. Moving into poses that are challenging, breathing when it is difficult to be in a pose that is uncomfortable, holding poses that strengthen me and empower me… yoga provides me flexibility. Flexibility to bend. Flexibility to grow. Flexibility to strengthen myself physically, mentally, and spiritually. Recently, I held wheel pose (which is a back bend) for five breaths…my personal best. I was literally bending just like those arches I saw this past summer and I realized, I will not break. In fact, I was so proud of my ability to bend and become stronger in that moment which I can now carry over into my every day life when faced with challenges that initially make me feel like I will break.
Pictured here: Me practicing Warrior III, King Dancer, and Standing Hip Opener. My family practicing making fun of me – well joke all you want now peeps! I love them so much.
Through my yoga practice, I am able to bend. Through the challenges I face as a mother, I am able to bend. Through obstacles that life throws at me, I am able to bend. Each time I bend, I grow stronger. Each time I bend, I model for my children how to be flexible in life, how to enjoy these opportunities for growth that God provides, and how to practice what I love: practicing yoga, being in nature, being with my family. What is it that you love, that can help you become more bendy? What do you enjoy in your life that gives you strength to face the obstacles that are thrown your way?
My devotion recently from Paul David Tripp – New Morning Mercies – “God’s grace often comes to us in uncomfortable forms. It may not be what you and I want, but it is precisely what we need. God is faithful; he will use the brokenness of this world that is your present address to complete the loving work of personal transformation that he has begun.” My present address: a mom of a struggling child. Also at my present address: a God who provides me with grace to transform me. A God to help me bend and not break. A God to mold me into the mother he is creating me to be. A God to allow me to grow stronger, more flexible. My God makes me bendy and as long as I rely on Him, I will not break.
Faithfully Real 
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